Ben Davis November 29, What makes a person approachable? Is being approachable a good thing? How do you know if you are approachable? Is approachable a personality trait? What does it mean to not be approachable? Is approachability a skill? How can I be more approachable at work? How can I be a more approachable leader? How can I be approachable at a bar? What makes a guy approachable? How do I become more friendly? We also quickly seek eye contract and that's a struggle for some people.
But, in our country, we are an eye-contact culture for a sign of trust. People aren't hopeless, but they are definitely making impressions and hopeful that we'll mirror each other--monkey see, monkey do. Try smiling at a stranger--they usually smile back or at least nod. In both cases, there's eye contact and a quick connection. We need this as humans. Active listening is one of the least-taught skills in leadership. As this historic study on human communication, published in Harvard Business Review decades ago, points out, we spend 70 to 80 percent of our waking hours in some form of communication, and of that time, 45 percent is spent listening.
Here's the bad news: When we talk to a friend, boss, co-worker, or customer for 10 minutes, we pay attention to less than half of the conversation. Within 48 hours, whatever information we've retained decreases to 25 percent. In other words, we often comprehend and retain only one-fourth of what we hear. If you want to drive down the fast-track to likability, start actively listening to others with intent.
Boris Groysberg and Michael Slind make the need for good listening evident in their research published in the book Talk, Inc. They found that the most effective leaders in more than companies employ the principles of "organizational conversation. Operate your business as if it were two people having a conversation. Leaders who take organizational conversation seriously know when to stop talking and start listening.
Few behaviors enhance conversational intimacy as much as attending to what people say. True attentiveness signals respect for people of all ranks and roles, a sense of curiosity, and even a degree of humility. Ever been around people who are really positive and happy all the time? For your average mood swinger, they can be annoying as heck!
But here's what you can learn from people who genuinely express joy: They choose to live and enjoy life to the fullest. You now find yourself wanting to be part of their tribe--to soak up their positive energy, passion, and enthusiasm for life. These are extremely likable people. They express their joy in making a positive difference in the lives of others. They visit nursing homes, share meals with lonely people, learn to surf, volunteer at homeless shelters, teach CPR classes, eat exotic foods, and pick up a new skill frequently.
Be a Sounding Board: Approachable leaders understand that people will come to them with good and bad news. You must embrace compassion and engage empathy. Making yourself approachable and accessible is the secret ingredient to great leadership. Stay Curious: Approachable leaders stay open and ask lots of questions.
Stay curious and interested — there is always room to learn something new. Address Unapproachable Behaviors: in your team; make sure that everyone is seen as easy to do business with, says Riegel. Earn Total Trust :Approachable leaders possess a lot of information, adds Daskal. Close Search.
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